What is the Difference Between Assertive and Aggressive

The main difference between assertive and aggressive is that someone who is assertive respects the opinions of others while being straightforward and confident enough to show their own opinion whereas someone who is aggressive assumes their own opinions as absolutely correct, thus being harsh to others and not respecting their opinions.

Assertive and aggressive are two qualities or behavioural patterns in our personalities. Due to their similar nature, we often tend to confuse these two qualities as one, yet there is a distinct difference between assertive and aggressive. Being assertive doesn’t mean arguing with the others and offending them as being aggressive.

Key Areas Covered

1. What Does Assertive Mean
     – Definition, Nature, Characteristics
2. What Does Aggressive Mean
     – Definition, Nature, Characteristics
3. What is the Difference Between Assertive and Aggressive
     – Comparison of Key Differences

Key Terms

Assertive, Aggressive, Behavioral Patterns, Qualities, Psychology

Difference Between Assertive and Aggressive - Comparison Summary

What Does Assertive Mean

Assertive essentially means having or showing a confident personality. Thus, a person who is assertive is confident and self-assured. Therefore, when someone is assertive, they try to express their opinions, but at the same time, they respect others’ opinions as well. Therefore, by being self-assured, they honour themselves and stand up for their own opinions and beliefs.

Since assertive people respect others as equals, they are polite to others while confident in themselves as well. This is the line we can draw to differentiate assertive from aggressive. On the contrary to an assertive person, an aggressive person is always harsh to others and somehow try to affirm that they are the absolutely correct in everything by dominating others. Difference Between Assertive and Aggressive

In brief, assertive can be highlighted as the quality of being self-assured and confident without being aggressive. Similarly, assertive people have good communication skills, and they are very capable of convincing others, which is a good leadership quality. Therefore, assertive communication involves respect for the boundaries of oneself and others. Simultaneously, it also presumes an interest in the fulfilment of needs and wants through cooperation.

What Does Aggressive Mean

An aggressive person is someone who over-estimates oneself and is self-focused. They have a tendency to belittle others and their capacity for decision making. Moreover, they always try to assert their opinions by being harsh to others by arguing or in abusive physical ways. Thus, someone who is aggressive has a very dominating or tyrannical personality.

Therefore, a person who is aggressive is always ready to argue over any case. Therefore, there’s is a high sense of dominance in someone who is aggressive. They don’t respect others, and they impose their views forcibly on others, thereby violating individual freedom of choice and decision making of others.

Similarly, their behaviour is often expressed through sudden anger bursts, mood swings, verbal threats, tantrums or through the usage of social manipulation in order to make others accept their opinions.Main Difference - Assertive vs Aggressive

As a result, aggressive people always look forward to attacking or abusing others, verbally or even physically; they always have an urge to win. Hence, when someone is aggressive, they see hurting the other not as something negative, but merely as a by-product of a successful communication or negotiation.

Difference Between Assertive and Aggressive

Definition

Assertive is being self-assured and confident about one’s own opinions while aggressive is over-estimating one’s opinions and being harsh to others by arguing with them. Thus, the difference between assertive and aggressive is self-explanatory from this definition.

Respect to Others

Arising from the above is another difference between assertive and aggressive. That is, when someone is assertive, they respect others as well, whereas when someone is aggressive, they don’t respect others.

Opinions

Furthermore, assertive is being confident enough to show their opinions to others while aggressive is being harsh and rude to the opinions of others

Attitudes

Moreover, assertive people have a confident and self-assured attitude about themselves, and they respect others as well. On the contrary, aggressive people have a haughty attitude about themselves; therefore, they disregard or underestimate others without respecting them.

Outcome

The respective outcome of these behaviors leads to another important difference between assertive and aggressive. That is, there is comparatively a positive outcome from assertive quality whereas there is a negative outcome from aggressive quality.

Conclusion

Both assertive and aggressive are behavioural qualities of human beings. Thus, many of us tend to get assume over these two behavioural qualities are the same, which is incorrect. Therefore, the main difference between assertive and aggressive is that someone who is assertive respects the opinions of others while being straightforward and confident to show their own opinion whereas someone who is aggressive assumes their own opinions as absolutely correct thus, being harsh to others and not respecting their opinions.

Image Courtesy:

1. “2122020” (CC0) via Pixabay
2. “1372269” (CC0) via Pxhere

About the Author: Upen

Upen, BA (Honours) in Languages and Linguistics, has academic experiences and knowledge on international relations and politics. Her academic interests are English language, European and Oriental Languages, Internal Affairs and International Politics, and Psychology.

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